Mayhem and Motherhood

Growing Up and Moving Out

Well, it's here... sophomore year at Radford University.  This year is different, however.  This year, Megan has her own apartment... no more hot, sweaty, smelly dorm room for her...no sir'ee.  She has a four bedroom apartment with three roommates. 

Now, I don't know about ya'll, but when I first went out on my own, I had hand-me-down EVERYTHING.  The only new stuff I had were items I had collected in my "hope" chest from age 12.  Yes, I know, I'm dating myself.  No one has hope chests anymore.  Why should they when you have suckers like my husband and I for parents.

Several weeks ago, we took a trip to IKEA to pick up a bed frame.  We came back with a bed, a library table, a desk system, three lamps, silverware, various cooking vessels and utensils and other colorful essentials...not to mention a much lighter checkbook. 

Well, of course, we all know that you can't have a new bed without a new array of linens and coordinating accessories.  Off to Target we go.  Thank God for Target.  We picked up a new duvet cover with matching sheets, shams, pillow cases, rug, throw pillows and yes, the ever essential long body pillow.  So this was it.  This was the end of our furnishing of the apartment.  NO MORE.  Checkbook well is dry, right?...Wrong.  We wound up having to supply a dining set and microwave.  Well, they need a table to eat at and a microwave to cook in.  I mean, what's wrong with you people...don't you know anything?

Now we're done spending.  All is well.  Saturday we make the 3-hour trip to put everything together..set up and then get the hell out of there by 5ish, right?  Wrong.

Our little darling has a grocery list because her meal plan doesn't start for a week.  Yeah, OK, that makes sense.  While hubby is busy with the power tools, us girls head off the Wal-mart and the Dollar Store.  Between the two, we end up with trash cans, dish towels, oven mitts, broom, healthy food, not so healthy food, bake ware, sharp knives, first-aid stuff (in case she cuts herself with the sharp knives), glassware, curtain rod and the ever essential cookie jar.  OK, we all know a home is not a home without a cookie jar.

Shopping is done and upon return we find the bed is conquered and the desk is under attack.  One of Megan's roommate's parents are there tackling the construction of an entertainment center.  By 8:00 that evening, everything was constructed, cleaned and put in the appropriate places.  I even managed to construct a fruit salad for my child.  She does need something healthy to snack on, you know.

We bid our girl farewell, gave the usual kisses, hugs, tears and "I love yous".  Twenty minutes into our ride home, my phone rings...it's Megan:  "I'm coming home Monday for a few days, there's nothing to do here until school starts." 

Excuse me?.... how about finding a job.

Lisa

One Down, Three to Go...

For those of you who have kids around the age of 19 to 21, you know what time of year it is.  Yes, it’s that time when all of our little darlings leave the safety and coziness of their cramped smelly dorm rooms and return to the nest for a summer filled with relaxation and trips to the beach with friends that they haven’t seen since Christmas break.  At least, that’s what they think. 

My daughter came home from school on Friday.  In less than 24 hours, she had given me her itinerary for the summer and I just wasn’t sure where the terms “working” and “making money” fit in.  There were trips to the beach, vacation with her father and weekends at the river (or as we say here in Virginia, the rivah). 

Hello, do I look like I have ATM tattooed on my forehead?  In an attempt to prevent a full scale battle within the first day of her return, I took a deep breath and counted to ten.  I then tried to explain to her the importance of making and saving money over the summer so she would be able to help furnish her off campus apartment (oh, did I tell you she’s getting an apartment) and have a cushion of cash in the event of an emergency.  At this point, I was pretty proud of myself.  I hadn’t flown off the handle like I usually do.  Wow, maybe I was finally getting this positive parenting thing down.  Unfortunately, she’s much better at getting her way than I am at enforcement.  She proceeded to whine to me how she had kept her grades up during this freshman year while working to organize and set up a new sorority; and went on to say how she didn’t get kicked out of school for alcohol and academic infractions (like that’s a real accomplishment) like some of her fellow students.  Well strike up the band ‘cause we’re having a parade.  NOT! 

At this point, the adrenalin started to flow and those prehistoric survival skills kicked in.   I squinched up my face and proudly displayed those three wrinkles on my forehead that I have worked so hard over the years for; and in a voice that could only be described as something from an exorcism, I gave my daughter my summer itinerary for her which included actual work and allowed as to how she would be sleeping on the floor of her new apartment if she didn’t take my itinerary to heart.  Gosh, think she got the message?

Well, it’s Tuesday and I’m happy to say that Megan has seen the light and has managed to schedule her summer events around a nice full working schedule.  So there's a lesson to be learned here that I will keep in mind for next summer.  Why bother with positive parenting when threats work just as well.

Lisa